"The PISGAH 111K is the ultimate cross-country-endurance mountain bike race. Racers follow a set 111 kilometer course on the finest trails and gravel roads Pisgah National Forest has to offer. The route includes over 11,000 feet of climbing along the way. This is a true mountain bike race with no map reading skills required, just follow the arrows." Pisgah Productions
Sounds amazing, huh?
I've trained, I could be more ready, but I think I'm ready. Physically. My mental state not so much. I've hit the wall there and lack the confidence to go out and attempt this thing. Is that a bad thing? Possibly not.
Do I want this bad enough to finish no matter what? No.
Am I going to give 100%? Yes
Am I going to give 110%? No, because I've been there and done that and landed in the hurt locker, having to call and rely on EMS to bring life back into my failing body.
Do I want to be out on the bike in the rain for 12 hours? No
Do I want to be worn out for two weeks after? No
Do I want to ride my bike, turn where I want, stop where I want, when I want? Yes
Do I want to complete this beast? Yes
Will I regret if I don't try it this year? Don't know, I usually don't regret my decisions
And so goes the conversation in my head. I'm just not 100% into it. There is a chance I will line up and give it a go, and decide throughout the day if I'm into it and have the desire to ride through and finish, but there is equal chance that I won't.
I guess I'll keep the mental dialogue going until I decide...... or not.