Wednesday, December 30, 2009

Wondering

6 yrs ago, I was sitting in Las Vegas, with Rhonda, visiting my older brother and his family. We had moved to Durango, CO to work in public schools teaching abstinence as a way to prevent STD's and pregnancy.....amazingly enough it works!. After moving to Durango, promises were broken, things were not how they had been presented, and we were being treated poorly. We confronted the boss first, and with no response or change, we confronted the board. After some long stressful days and sleepless nights, we walked away.

Sometimes you stay and fight, sometimes you have to let go.

I searched for a job, high and low. There was nothing available that would support us. Rhonda was pregnant and due in 5 months too. We had several options but the best one seemed to be to move into a friend's basement in Asheville, NC.

We continued to look for a job for the rest of January and moved in February. The day I picked up the moving truck, I got a phone call saying that there was a job opening. By that time I was so worn out, I declined and drove the truck home to start loading. I sometimes briefly wonder what would have happened had I taken that job, only briefly though with no regrets. Then I think about all the things, good and bad, that would NOT have happened had I taken that job.

As a last hurrah, CO dumped snow on us as we loaded the truck. At that time we had a VW Fox station wagon, and a Honda Accord. The VW we loaded onto a trailer, packed full, with boats on top, loaded the truck which I drove and put Rhonda and Texas in the Honda. Finally, late one snowy, dark cold night, we headed down the road towards Albuquerque, NM.

Looking back on the past 6 years and the things that I have learned, more about myself than anything, I don't regret that decision at all. I have realized that there will always be other things that I want to be doing, places I want to go, and it is good to have dreams. But if those dreams distract me from what I am here to do now, they become a hindrance.

I think that there are periods in life when everything works out and a person has a chance to wander around this world, free and unfettered, and then at some point, other things work out and a person buys a project house, gets a stable job, has a kid and becomes content with living right here, right now.

So, here I am, 6 years later, still dreaming of doing big things in this world, but realizing that it is the small things that often have the biggest impact!

Have a great day.

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