This week I was told" Thanks for ruining my week", I was called rediculous, immature, childish, a hard headed idiot, told I was acting like a Nazi, and told that talking to me was like talking to a 3rd grader. I have been studying and processing my experiences for several years now. I'm not sure how much more I need to confirm that the relationship is not healthy. And, after doing quite a bit of research realize the relationship is categorized as abusive.
I am partially to blame for not making a stand earlier in life. But due to a low self esteem, I didn't think I had the courage to stand up for myself. So, I stayed in the relationship and endured.
But, not anymore. I am making a stand and not going to take it anymore. I am my own person and I will not be manipulated by the fear that you won't approve. I will not be bullied into acting like you think I should, so that you will be pleased. While I care about you, as I care about anyone, I will not subject myself, or my family to that environment. You cannot and will not control me.
I was also asked if I could forgive someone without ever talking to that someone. While it would be peachy keen to do so, I believe that if that were possible, it would invalidate the true meaning of forgiveness. The underlying meaning behind the question is " can't we just sweep this under the rug and move on". In order to experience forgiveness, there has to be repentance. So, no, while I am fully prepared to forgive, I cannot forgive unless there is repentance. True, upfront and honest; with no excuses.
If you are in an abusive relationship, please get help. If I can do it, so can you.
Time to move on.
Have a great day!!
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